NOSEY BIO: Loud, brass, and tastelessly attired, I.B. Nosey is famed for his exuberant “Greetings, cybernuts! This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter!” He seeks answers to the kind of probing questions no accredited journalist would deem intelligent, let alone newsworthy enough, to ask. Fleet of foot, wide of mouth, and fluent of tongue-in-cheek, I.B. Nosey’s unique interviewing style is comparable to none.

Winner of the Pukelitzer Award. Spokesman for Gum Drop Island’s confectionary plantation. Featured in InD’Tale magazine and The Woven Tale Press.


Monday, December 4, 2017

December 2017 Insecure Writer's Support Group



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NOSEY: Greetings, cybernuts! This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter reporting this month's posting about the Insecure Writer's Support Group. I know you're asking -and since I've got my nose to the news before anyone else can even scent a whiff and am, naturally, the journalist who can answer all your 'wanna knows', heh heh --

WOMEN: *screams*



WOMEN: Get a move on! Tell us this month's insecure question!

NOSEY: Who you demanding to get a move on? *grinds teeth* Listen, girlies. You're horning in on my Nosey posting and I want you OUT!

WOMEN: We're insecure writers, and we're not leaving until we hear Alex Cavanaugh's question.

NOSEY: Oh yeah? You wanna hear it, huh? What for?

WOMEN: Why not? After all, he's the group genius behind this blog hop.

NOSEY: A genius? *scoffs* Alex? Hey, I interviewed him and he couldn't even fly a spaceship across a galaxy without dumping out his cargo.

BLOND: *giggles* Did you ever think that maybe he tipped that ship on purpose?

NOSEY: Yeah, I-- huh? 

BRUNETTE: Never mind, Barsha. I know how to get Alex's question. *reaches over and grabs paper from Nosey's tweedy-weedy blazer pocket*

BARSHA: *grins* Ooh. Excellent idea, Ban.

NOSEY: Hey, no stealing from the official unofficial reporter, gals. *hesitates* Wait a minute. Barsha and Ban. *narrows gaze* Who are you, really?

BAN: *tosses head* We're the girls who need to steer this post along. As in... *reads from card* Yes, it's right here. First, Alex states the purpose of the ISWG blog, which is--

BARSHA: *interrupts* Oh, I know that by heart. It's 'To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It's a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!'

NOSEY: But listen--

BAN: Barsha, Barsha, Barsha, you're so right on. And here is this month's question for our readers/authors: 'As you look back on 2017, with all its successes/failures, if you could backtrack, what would you do differently?'

NOSEY: But--

BARSHA: And, how clever! Miss Mae has her answers clipped to this card! *winks at Nosey*

NOSEY: But--

BAN: What does she say, Barsha, Barsha, Barsha?

NOSEY: *grimaces* Well, she doesn't say that.

BARSHA: No, she doesn't, Ban, Ban, Ban.

NOSEY: *groans*

BARSHA: But what Miss Mae does say is: 'Yes, I do. For instance, I wrote a freebie thriller/mystery, Unleashed. I should've stuck with my instincts and waited a few days before uploading. After I completed some later, better edits, I then put up the corrected version. A week later I downloaded and tested the Kindle/Mobi format and, darn it, that first edition is what I got. It's current on the online reader at the site, but I'm cringing with embarrassment for those who read my first write-up.'

NOSEY: But--

BAN: Ugh. *wrinkles nose* What kind of author makes an error like that?

NOSEY: But--

BARSHA: An insecure one, I'd say. *clucks tongue* C'mon, Ban. Let's hop over to Alex's blog and check out what the other authors have to say this month.

NOSEY: But--

BAN: Good idea. *strolls beside Barsha stage left, and then whispers in aside* Did you get a load of that blazer the fella's wearing? Who threw up on him?

NOSEY: I heard that! 


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Hey, yo, readers! Be nosey, and sign up for Miss Mae's newsletter! Why not? It's FREE!

***********

And, did you also know that a short tale about me, I.B. Nosey, your favorite intrepid internet reporter is FREE for you to simply download? Yes, come meet your Fated Destiny...Oh,Yeah! 


  

  


Wednesday, November 1, 2017

November 2017 Insecure Writers Support Group Post


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NOSEY: Greetings, cybernuts! This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter coming to you this November to announce - Yes, once again! - it's time for another Insecure Writer Support meeting. *looks around* Everyone, sit in your seat and grab a Gum Drop Island chocolate bar while we hip, hop, boogey 'roung the blogs to 'be nosy' and see what everyone else has to say. Heh heh.

Now, as a reminder the purpose of ISWG is:

Purpose: To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!

And so, November's question is:                                           

Win or not, do you usually finish your NaNo project? Have any of them gone on to be published?

MM: *calls off stage* Nosey, are you asking me?

NOSEY: Uhhh, only if I've gotta.

MM: Well, have you written a NaNo project?

NOSEY: Um...now that you mention it--

MM: Of course you haven't. So I'll take it from here. *grabs Nosey's microphone*


MM: Greetings, my fellow Nosey fans. As that famous official unofficial reporter announced, this month's official unofficial ISWG question is posed: Win or not, do you usually finish your NaNo project? Have any of them gone on to be published?

MM: My answer? I signed up for NaNo once and it took about 24 hours for me to discover that my creativity was frustrated by a "have to" attitude, as in "have to" finish by set deadline. So no, I did not finish and that particular project was finished outside of NaNo.

NOSEY: *gasps* What? You didn't finish? My creator quit? You quit a project?

MM: *waves hand* Pfft. I had to, Nosey, so that I could daydream and conceive the likes of you.

NOSEY: Yeah? *puffs out chest* Well, in that case you've given cyberspace the ultimate prize, heh heh.

MM: I thought you'd see it that way. *turns to address audience* Everyone, the blog is active so keep on clicking.

NOSEY: Gimme that. *snatches microphone away from MM* Just because I'm a prize don't mean you can steal my Feeling Nosey? spotlight. *clears throat* Until next month, this is Pukelitzer Prize award winning I.B. Nosey signing off!


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(Hop over to ISWG here)

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Hey, yo, readers! Be nosey, and sign up for Miss Mae's newsletter! Why not? It's FREE!

***********

And, did you also know that a short tale about me, I.B. Nosey, your intrepid internet reporter is FREE for you to simply download? Yes, come meet your Fated Destiny...Oh,Yeah! 




Wednesday, October 4, 2017

IWSG Photo Taken with I.B. Nosey - Know You're Jealous, People, But...

Greetings, cybernuts! This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter reporting to you today in participation with that Insecure Writer's Support Group 'Take a Photo with a Swag'. (Who, me? The swag? Uhhh...)

Anyway, they wanted an official unofficial photo with -who else- that Pukelitzer Award Winning journalist -me!

So here we are...


Funked out in my classic one-of-a-kind tweedy weedy blazer. Suitable for framing, of course. Heh heh.

October 2017 Insecure Writers Support Group

Run for your Sanity! It's a Brand New I.B. Nosey Posting for the Insecure Writer's Support Group!



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Go to IWSG Page Here


NOSEY: Greetings, cybernuts! This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter with this month's -which happens to be October, in case you haven't been keeping up with me (and shamey if you aren't!)- IWSG's posting.

NOSEY: Yes, once again, you'll have your new monthly answer. But first, 'cause I know you're wondering this, what is the purpose of the ISWG? Glad you asked, 'cause, like, ya know, I can handle that. Heh heh. Sure I can 'cause I have what I'm supposed to say right here on my cheat sheet.

NOSEY: *flips open paper and reads*Purpose: To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!

NOSEY: Hey, that's a great purpose, right? Miss Mae, who happens to be my author, thinks so and she's eager to answer this question for you --

*Feminine voice interrupts* Excuse me, hello! I'll answer for Miss Mae.

NOSEY: Huh? *twirls around* Who said that?

MQ: It's me, Ms. Quotes. Gosh, you haven't forgotten me, have you, Nosey? *looks all innocent*

NOSEY: *grinds teeth* I haven't forgot how you horned in on my last posting.

MQ: Goody, you do remember. Right, and so I'm here to--

NOSEY: Oh no, you don't, girlie. Can't ya read? This blog ain't named 'Feeling Blond?' It's 'Feeling Nosey?' which means it's my blog.

MQ: But--

NOSEY: Nope. Nothing doing. Shoo, scram, kiddo. You're bugging me. *pushes her behind stage-left's curtain*


MQ: *peeks around* Gosh, Nosey, can't you - ?

NOSEY: Hey. *scowls* Listen. You need a beauty makeover. One of those wide eyelashes you're so fond of fluttering is hanging by a - well, by a hair.

MQ: It is? *gasps* Oh no! *sounds of staccato heels racing off stage* 

NOSEY: *mutters* Sheesh. Some reporters just love to cram their pesky microphones in people's faces. *clears throat* As I was saying...*hesitates* Hm. What was I saying? *brightens* Oh yeah. This month's question for you IWSG fans:

"Have you ever slipped any of your personal information into your characters, either by accident or on purpose?"

NOSEY: And so now, take it away, Miss Mae! *graciously hands over mic to MM - although maybe not quite so graciously, as begrudingly, but anyhoo -*




MISS MAE: Thank you, my official unofficial reporter. Well, how do I answer this month's question? *brow puckers in thought* Let's see. I guess I could start by saying that though it might not be information exactly, I think I've unwittingly slipped somewhat of a window into revealing bits of my own personality. By that, I mean if anyone reads my romantic mysteries, you'll find it challenging to deduce the answers. That's because I love puzzles - puzzling puzzles with twisty, unforeseen, intricate plots. However, when it comes to my characters I.B. Nosey, Ms. Quotes, Sir O. Yuri Wiseguy-eh, The Narrator, Heathcliff the private detective possum and the other 'mischaps' from my Gum Drop Island series of children's/kid-at-heart/humorous adventure tales, readers learn that I'm quirky, have a dry wit, adore puns, and enjoy a side of slapstick. And...uhhh.... *gives inquiring glance at Nosey* Think that's enough?

NOSEY: Yeah, yeah. *dismisses MM with a bored grimace* That's plenty of information that you couldn't decide if it was information or not.

MISS MAE: *sighs with relief* Good! You know how I hate speaking in public. *hands over microphone, pecks Nosey's cheek, straightens his tie, fluffs his hair, and then rushes to back office where she keeps her Acer laptop with the dusty keyboard*

NOSEY: And there, cybernuts, you have your answer straight from Miss Mae's own - er, um - fingertips. Heh heh. So, until next month - oh, wait! *starts with remembrance* Yeah. Okay. Can't forget this. Huh uh, nope. Too important. And what is it? Why, just that you'll be happy to know I'm participating in ISWG's 'Show Us Your Writer's Insecurity' photo swag contest. Yeah, that's right. Cool, Pukelitzer Award winning journalist, me! You don't wanna miss that photo, Nosey fans. It's sure to be a collector's item!


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 NOSEY: Folks, the blog hop is still leaping, so get on over to the IWSG and read some other terrific authors' posts. And tell 'em... that Nosey sent ya.


"Nosey sent me - Nosey sent me - Nosey sent me -"


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Hey, yo, readers! Be nosey, and sign up for Miss Mae's newsletter! Why not? It's FREE!

***********

And, did you also know that a short tale about me, I.B. Nosey, your intrepid internet reporter is FREE for you to simply download? Yes, come meet your Fated Destiny...Oh, Yeah! 



Wednesday, September 6, 2017

September 2017 IWSG Wednesday!


Annddddd, the one, the only, official unofficial Pukelitzer award winning cyberspace reporter....Duh, duh! None other thannnnnn.....

I.B. Nosey! De man, folks!

NOSEY: Greetings, cybernuts! This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter reporting to you that it's that time again. What time? No, not Howdy Doody time, but the fun time of hop, hop, hop. Yep, it's the IWSG blog hop with the official unofficial reason for said hop:

 Purpose: To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!

I mean, how cool is that, right? And the cool question that's being asked this month is....

MQ: *coughs* Um, excuse me, I need to interrupt for a moment.

NOSEY: Huh? *blinks* Who are you?

MQ: I'm Ms. Quotes. I'm taking over for Miss Mae today, so I'll answer the question.



NOSEY: *snarls* Yeah? Who sez so?

MQ: She does, so if you don't mind squeezing over just a teensy...

NOSEY: Of course I mind! I'm the official unofficial spokesman for...!

MQ: Yes, for everything Gum Drop Island, but I'm for Miss Mae.

NOSEY: Uhhh...what?

MQ: *giggles* Don't worry. She still loves you, Nosey-Posey.

NOSEY: *makes face* Ugh!

MQ: *clears throat* Hi, everyone. This is Ms. Quotes. And a special 'hello' to you, Alex J. Cavanaugh. *flutters lashes* As I was saying, here is this month's ISWG question:

'Have you ever surprised yourself with your writing? For example, by trying a new genre you didn't think you'd be comfortable in?'

And Miss Mae says: "I sure have! I am truly a romantic mystery author, emphasis on mystery with a sprinkle of romance. All my books are award winners. (Yay!) But especially with 'It's Elementary, My Dear Winifred', I was peppered with urges from readers to make that into a series. Um, a series? No, thanks. I'm not a series sort of writer. I mean, my stories are complete in themselves. However, after time, with five of these romantic mystery books under my belt, when I was a little burned out with the complexities of such plots, I dabbled in something I never thought I would - a children's humor/fantasy story. Not so sure this would be accepted, I even used not Miss Mae, but M.M., and I kept it short - just in case, you know, it was a complete flop. Imagine my shock when readers actually liked it! And grumbled because it was too short! And, once again, I was pressed to "continue the story."

Well. So rather I was a series kind of writer or not, here was something I needed to consider. Could I do it? Could I actually do it?

Again, much to my surprise, I did. As a matter-of-fact, the third book in the series 'Ahoy, Mischaps!' (with I.B. Nosey included, of course) is for sale. Wow. Major accomplishment. How many books will there be? At this point, I'm not sure. But I took the plunge and I've even changed the M.M. to Miss Mae. Ha! How about that?" 

NOSEY: So. *glares* Are you quite finished with stealing my spotlight, Miss Quotes?

MQ: That's Ms. Quotes, Nosey. *jabs his tweedy-weedy jacket with a shapely finger* And for your information-- *gasps* Oh, no!

NOSEY: *rolls eyes* What now?

MQ: I broke a nail! *sobs* Quick! Call an ambulance! 


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NOSEY: Folks, the blog hop is still leaping, so get on over to the IWSG and read some other terrific authors' posts. And tell 'em...*winks* Nosey sent ya.



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Hey, yo, readers! Be nosey, and sign up for Miss Mae's newsletter! Why not? It's FREE!

***********

And, did you also know that a short tale about me, I.B. Nosey, your intrepid internet reporter is FREE for you to simply download? Yes, come meet your Fated Destiny...Oh, Yeah! heh heh





Wednesday, August 2, 2017

August 2017 Insecure Writer's Support Group



Heh heh heh, cybernuts! This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter reporting to you that it's that time again. What time? The fun time! Of IWSG blog hop with the official unofficial:

 Purpose: To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!

Yep, share and encourage. That's what we do...er, um, that's writers like what Miss Mae does, actually. Heh heh.

So what's going on this month? How about this handy question which Miss Mae is itching to answer:

"What are your pet peeves when reading/writing/editing?"

Take it away, Miss Mae!

From Miss Mae: "I've discovered that writing is a skill that must be learned. Just because you have an idea/story bouncing around in your mind doesn't mean that you necessarily KNOW how to describe that on paper. One of the best things I learned is not to write (for instance): "I started running", or "I began to read". A verb must follow the noun. So did you "start" or did you "begin"? Just go ahead and write: "I ran", or "I read". Forget about the "start, began". (When I read sentences like that now, yes, a pet peeve that makes me grit my teeth).

Another is something that's physically impossible for the human body to do, such as: "All eyes locked on the stranger who entered the room". Hm. Can "eyes" lock? No. Gazes, but not eyes. 

Learning these improved my writing, and when you think about it, just makes sense."


Back again to I.B. Nosey...

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Hey, yo, readers! Be nosey, and sign up for Miss Mae's newsletter! Why not? It's FREE!

***********

And, did you also know that a short tale about me, I.B. Nosey, your intrepid internet reporter is FREE for you to simply download? Yes, come meet your Fated Destiny...Oh, Yeah! heh heh



Wednesday, July 5, 2017

July 2017 Insecure Writer's Support Group



Greetings, cyber-nuts. This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter reporting to you from my official unofficial post with The Insecure Writer's Support Group blog hop.

If you're not a follower of this blog hop, maybe you should be, 
'cause it's official unofficially good stuff!

How do you start? Simple. Visit that above link, and you'll discover that author Alex J. Cavanaugh put together his swell blog in an effort to help authors succeed in their writing. 

Can't think of stuff to write about for your own blog? No problem, 'cause all ya gotta do is click over to Alex's site and borrow the question he posts.

Now, is that helpful or what?

This month he asks: "What is one valuable lesson you've learned since you've started writing?"

And, of course, at this point I throw my atomic microphone to Miss Mae and allow her to answer. Heh heh.

Miss Mae: "Great question! I guess one thing I've learned is patience. Gee, writing is hard enough, but as I've stated before, marketing is tremendous effort...and I'm not real good at it. So, trying to find new and creative ways to 'get my name/books out there' seems to be an unending process. Congrats to those who've succeeded!"

Back again to I.B. Nosey...


Well, she was right to the point, eh, folks? I think she might be kinda busy, ya know, trying to open marketing doors, heh heh.

So allow me to sign off this month with this reminder: (okay, I'm trying to help her market and...hey! Don't throw that rotten egg! Aackkk!)

*******
Hey, yo, readers! Be nosey, and sign up for Miss Mae's newsletter! Why not? It's FREE!

***********

And, did you also know that a short tale about me, I.B. Nosey, your intrepid internet reporter is FREE for you to simply download? Yes, come meet your Fated Destiny...Oh, Yeah! heh heh



Wednesday, June 7, 2017

June Insecure Writer's Support Group



Greetings, cyber-nuts. This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter reporting to you from my official unofficial post with The Insecure Writer's Support Group blog hop.

Yes, it's that time again.

Again, for what?

Well, allow me to officially unofficially explain.

See, if you visit the above link, you'll discover that author Alex J. Cavanaugh (who I got to recently interview, by the way) put together his swell blog in an effort to help authors succeed in their writing. And the list of authors that've signed up demonstrate how much they appreciate his effort.

And I, the only Pukelitzer award winning reporter ever to zoom across the unlimited boundaries of cyperspace, have borrowed the question from Alex's site because, you know, I'm just naturally cool that way.

June's question is: Did you ever say "I quit"? If so, what happened to make you come back to writing?

Answer from Miss Mae:

No, can't say that I have. Sometimes I've had to draw back because of a life event, or sometimes I might take a "recess". But I'm still here!

But, you know -- writing is hard. And if you're Indie, marketing is harder. And if you're not selling, or if you're going unnoticed...discouragement edges around the corner. That can put a lot of writers off, and understandably so.

Unless one gets so bored, or frustrated, or worried that it leads them into losing their love of writing -- I suggest to not give up!

When it comes right down to it - don't write for others, because you sure can't please everyone, but you can please yourself - and I think that's why we write. 

See you next month. :)

*******
Hey, yo, readers! Be nosey, and sign up for Miss Mae's newsletter! Why not? It's FREE!

***********

And, did you also know that a short tale about me, I.B. Nosey, your intrepid internet reporter is FREE for you to simply download? Yes, come meet your Fated Destiny...Oh, Yeah! heh heh



Thursday, May 18, 2017

Alex J. Cavanaugh Takes Flight with I.B. Nosey!


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NOSEY: Greetings, cybernuts! This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter! Today I’m coming to you from— waaah! *crashes into structure*

ALEX: *hears noise, throws open door* Nosey! *shakes head* Well, I’ve heard that you always make an entrance, but... *reaches up to pull Nosey –face first— out of side of door* Oh, man, Nosey. Your nose is really stuck. Wait a sec… *grunts and yanks and grunts and yanks and grunts and yanks…*

NOSEY: *voice muffled* C’mon, fella! Pull! This door isn’t made out of Nosey-ish material and I—I— *with a loud whoosh, he pops out from steel door*

ALEX: *drags Nosey inside* Did you really have to plow into the side of my spaceship?

NOSEY: Hey, it’s not my fault. *gingerly touches nose* When you fly without a parachute, it’s hard to direct your landing, ya know.

ALEX: Without a—? *mouth drops open, then he snaps it closed* No, don’t even answer that.

NOSEY: *looks around, and gives low whistle* Whoa, dude. What is this place?



ALEX: My spaceship, like I said. You don’t know where in outer space you are?

NOSEY: Of course I do. You’re speaking to the only Pukelitzer award winning cyberspace reporter. I’m a professional. I know how to do my job. *backs against wall, trips over feet, falls to floor*

ALEX: *quirks brow. Remains silent*

NOSEY: And this reporter… *leaps to feet, brushes down side of blazer* is here to report, dude. Yeah, nobody reports like me. I’m the one and only, and I’m here to report about you, Mr…er, um. Who are you, anyway?

ALEX: Alex J. Cavanaugh. You’re to interview me about my book, CassaDawn. *slaps hand to forehead and mutters* Can’t believe I signed up for this.

NOSEY: *chuckles* Oh, yeah. That’s right. Uh, wait a minute. *checks notebook*

ALEX: Are you serious? An old-fashioned notebook? Where’s your iphone?

NOSEY: What’s an iphone?

ALEX: *blinks* Forget I asked.

NOSEY: Ah ha! *brightens Yeah, something called CassaDawn by Alex J. Cavanaugh. See? *smirks* Told you I’m a professional.

ALEX: *grunts* All right. So let’s get started, ‘cause… *walks to console* I’ve got lots of work to do.

NOSEY: No problem, pal. I’ll just nosy around while we talk and check here, and look there— whoa! *opens closet door and jumps away* Holy Creepy Buggers! What’re these?

*Two large creatures jeeber and jeep and twitter and tweep*

ALEX: Oh, don’t mind them. That’s Quazy and Qootsie. They’re my pets. I got them at the planet ‘Upon a Blue Moon’.


(So these aliens aren't exactly as Nosey described, but do you think a real pic of Quazy and Qootsie can be found at the stock photo sites?)

NOSEY: But they’re green!

ALEX: *frowns in thought* Good point, Nosey. Maybe it wasn’t at ‘Upon a Blue Moon’. Maybe I picked ‘em up at ‘Chlorophyll Café’ while I refilled my energy tanks in the Z.P.D. Doo-dah quasar system.

NOSEY: *gulps* They’ve got only one eye, dude. Yeah, and one ear and five legs and…

ALEX: *scribbles on computer screen with fancy-dancy, personalized Alex J. Cavanaugh space pen* Watch it, Nosey. They do like to snuggle.

NOSEY: Heh heh. *tugs at collar and edges away as pair of ‘holy creepy buggers’ creep up in an unholy creepy buggy kind of way* Maybe this would be a good time to read the blurb of your book, Mr. Cavern…er, Mr. Cave-Man, I mean—

ALEX: That’s Alex J. Cavanaugh, and that’s a great idea, Nosey. *touches computer key and image of book pops up*



ALEX:  Here we go: ‘CassaDawn’ The prequel to the Amazon best-selling Cassa series! A pilot in training… Fighting the odds, Byron is determined to complete Cosbolt training. Poised at the top of his class, only one situation holds him back—his inability to work with anyone in the cockpit. Byron’s excellent piloting skills won’t be enough without a good navigator…      

*Sounds of Nosey slapping green ‘holy creepy buggers’ skin*

NOSEY: Don’t touch the threads of my tweedy-weedy blazer, guys!

ALEX: *glances across shoulder* Having trouble, Nosey?

NOSEY: Who? Me? *wipes sweat off brow* Er, no. No. Heh heh. Your pets, they’re… *grimaces* Snuggling too close. Yeech! *shies away as ‘holy creepy buggers’ flutter eyelashes* Can’t ya call ‘em off?

ALEX: Why? They love to hear about my Cassa series.

NOSEY: Ya think so, pal? I bet they don’t even know what the Cassa’s a series of.

ALEX:  Ah, sure they do. CassaDawn is the free short story that leads into the full-length science fiction trilogy. *grins* Hopefully, your readers won’t say it’s a series of unfortunate events.

NOSEY: Yeah, I— huh?

ALEX: So what can I tell you about Byron?

NOSEY: *gives fast look around* Who’s he?

ALEX: *sighs* C’mon, Nosey. Byron. The guy in my book. 

NOSEY: Oh. That Byron. *edges away from ‘holy creepy well, those same green buggers as before* Yeah. So who’re those odds he’s fighting?

ALEX: Say what?

NOSEY: You know. You said Byron’s fighting the Odds. *jerks thumb at buggers* They any relation to these fellas?

ALEX: Hm. Well, they are green skinned with big eyes…

NOSEY: I knew it! *skirts past a ‘far out’ space chair*

ALEX: *laughs* Byron’s ‘odds’ is his rebellion. It’s kept him on a very tight leash most of his life, his personal world invaded on every level. He’s not expected to succeed, you see, surely not as a top-level fighter pilot.

NOSEY: Uh huh. And you said he can’t work with anyone in a cockpit.  You -ah- *searches beneath table, behind chair, behind Alex’s back* got a cockpit stashed away in here?

ALEX: Well, it’s like this, Nosey. Cassans can communicate telepathically, something that’s demanded of a Cosbolt pilot and navigator.

NOSEY: Yeah? What’s that mean?

ALEX: It means Byron doesn’t like that connection. It all goes back to feeling invaded, you know. And, to answer your question about a cockpit — That’s where a pilot and navigator sit. And, um…*gives mock cough* not to be confused with where roosters fight. Or anything to do with—

NOSEY: *screams* Get away from my tweedy-weedied blazer pockets, you itchy fingers holy creepy buggers, you!



ALEX: That’s curious. *narrows gaze* What’s ya got in those pockets, Nosey?

NOSEY: Listen, Mac. *runs to other side of room to escape from green buggers flexing their itchy fingers in the depths of his bulging tweedy-weedied blazer pockets* I’m the interviewer. I ask the questions.

ALEX: *shrugs* You do know that I communicate telepathically with Quazy and Qootsie?

NOSEY: *slams on brakes and stares at Alex* For real?

ALEX: Course I do. What kind of space fiction interview would this be if I didn’t?

NOSEY: *lips curl in suspicious sneer* You can’t read my mind.

ALEX: Actually, you’re wanting to know what Cosbolt training is.

NOSEY: *gasps* I am?

ALEX: Aren’t you?

NOSEY: Uh, well. *drops voice to whisper* Since you mentioned it, I’ve got a Nosey feeling Cosbolt’s got nothing to do with Gum Drop Island chocolate, does it?

ALEX: Nope. And it’s got nothing to do with elves, either - Keebler’s or Santa’s ‘cause the Cosbolt is the elite space fighter ship. Those who fly her require several years of training. CassaDawn features the simulator-training phase.

NOSEY: Does it feature your pets too?

ALEX: No way. *winks* I brought them along especially for this interview.

NOSEY: Well, you didn’t do me any favors, bro. *bares teeth as green buggy pets jeeber and jeep and twitter and tweep and close in around Nosey*

ALEX: Ah, Nosey. They’re not making you feel insecure, are they?

NOSEY: Me? *puffs out chest* Hey, I’m the official unofficial reporter, and insecure is my middle name. *pauses* Uh, wait a minute.

ALEX: *grins* Yes?

NOSEY: Uhhh… *thinks, and then thinks again* Okay. What I meant was is that you have an insecure group, right, that you’re a leader of?

ALEX: That doesn’t sound any better.

NOSEY: But—

ALEX: Get your facts right, Nosey.

NOSEY: But—

ALEX: The fact is that I have a blog called ‘The Insecure Writers Group’.



NOSEY: Yeah. You offer support, right? Like Lego blocks?

ALEX: Well, an insecure writer is pretty much every writer. We have concerns, worries, fears, issues - it’s a lot of fun. Want to join us?

NOSEY: Yeah, I— huh?

ALEX: *snaps fingers* Oh, that’s right. You’re an interviewer, not a writer. So guess you don’t need our support that’s more like Lego blocks and less like—

*Alarm bell rings and spaceship veers violently*

ALEX: *takes command of steering wheel. Yes, steering wheel because every spaceship has one. Right, Alex?* Time to end the interview, Nosey. The space air marshal is hot on my tail. I’ve gotta outrun him.

NOSEY: What? Why? *spins in agitated circle* You a space bad guy? What’d ya do? Steal a couple thousand of Milky Way Bars?

ALEX: Ha! That jerk’s been after me ever since I stole his girl.

NOSEY: B-b-but I thought you were a bachelor!

ALEX: Of Fine Arts, yep.

NOSEY: So you stole Ms. Fine Arts?

ALEX: Huh uh. I stole, and managed to wed, Ms. Fine-Looking.

*Ship streaks across galaxies, comets, planets…and lots of other spacey-kinda constellations*

NOSEY: Whoa! Can’t you drive, fella? What kinda pilot are you? *thuds against spaceship wall while Quazy and Qootsie look kinda Queasy*

ALEX: You gotta exit, Nosey, cause you’re not allowed in any CassaDawn Outer Limits. *pushes button and space door unlatches.*

NOSEY: Huh? Whadda ya…? Aiiii! *falls into the depths of  black and white, spooky, really creepy Twilight Zone*

ALEX: Nosey! Watch out for— *winces* My apologies, Mr. Serling. 


*************


Alex J. Cavanaugh has a Bachelor of Fine Arts degree and works in web design, graphics, and technical editing. A fan of all things science fiction, his interests range from books and movies to music and games. Online he is the Ninja Captain and founder of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group. He’s the author of Amazon Best-Sellers CassaStar, CassaFire, CassaStorm, and Dragon of the Stars. The author lives in the Carolinas with his wife.

Find Alex here:

His Website 
Amazon

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